Jesus takes away unforgiveness
Last in the series of Jesus takes away – looking at some of the messes Jesus cleans up in our lives. Today’s is a biggie – unforgiveness
Unforgiveness is choosing to stay trapped in a jail cell of bitterness, serving time for someone else's crime
Unforgiveness is like drinking poison yourself and waiting for the other person to die.
Cortney Sargent: Unforgiveness is not a loner. It brings its friends along for the ride. If you allow unforgiveness to settle, dwell, and remain
in your heart, you will experience strife, hatred, anger, bitterness, jealousy, and resentment—all of which hardens your heart toward God.
Joyce Meyer: Many people ruin their health and their lives by taking the poison of bitterness, resentment and unforgiveness. Matthew 18:23-35 tells us that if we do not forgive people, we get turned over to the torturers. If you have a problem in this area or have ever had one, I'm sure you bear witness with what I'm saying. It's torture to have hateful thoughts toward another person rolling around inside your head.
Three things define unforgiveness
Revenge – I’m going to get even
Resentment – I’m going to stay angry
Remembering – I’ll never forget
Hebrews 12:14-15 warns, “Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root rises up to cause trouble and defile many.” Similarly, 2 Corinthians 2:5-11 warns that unforgiveness can be an opening for Satan to derail us.
So unforgiveness makes us bitter, defiles us, opens us up to Satan derailing us, acts like a poison and is a jail cell, doing time for someone else’s crime.
When you have been hurt by someone else, we naturally want revenge, to get even, we are resentful and it’s hard to forget
Eph 4:32 simply says “Be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving one another as God in Christ forgave you.”
The truth is that people choose to be unforgiving—it is a deliberate decision and a self-inflicted pain. We carry the illusion that other people have caused our misery, but in reality, we have elected to take on a form of self-imposed bondage. It is a spiritual “acid” that eats through the spirit within us. Few people realize the terrible effects of unforgiveness.
Unforgiveness is a chronic anxiety…According to Dr. Steven Standiford, chief of surgery at the Cancer Treatment Centers of America, refusing to forgive makes people sick and keeps them that way.
With that in mind, forgiveness therapy is now being used to help treat diseases, such as cancer.
“It’s important to treat emotional wounds or disorders because they really can hinder someone’s reactions to the treatments, even someone’s willingness to pursue treatment,” Standiford explained. Of all cancer patients, 61 percent have forgiveness issues, and of those, more than half are severe, according to research by Dr. Michael Barry, a pastor and the author of the book, The Forgiveness Project.
“Harboring these negative emotions, this anger and hatred, creates a state of chronic anxiety,” he said.
“Chronic anxiety very predictably produces excess adrenaline and cortisol, which deplete the production of natural killer cells, which is your body’s foot soldier in the fight against cancer,” he explained.
Is that enough reasons why we need to forgive others?
To forgive, we need to realise how much we have been forgiven – Matt 18:23-35
Jesus told a story to illustrate his answer to Peter’s question – how much should we forgive others. The Rabbis of the time taught three times, Peter thought maybe 7 times was enough. Jesus said 70 times 7 – basically always forgive. He then told a parable to illustrate the point.
The servant owed 10,000 talents – a talent was 20 years wages for a labourer. The average builder earns £23k in the UK – so a talent is just under half a million pounds. 10,000 talents is thus around about £5billion pounds. So the story is about a CEO of a bank! An impossible debt to pay off. So the King lets him off. The point is that God’s grace is infinite – we have been forgiven so much.
The servant then sees someone who owes him 100 denarii – a hundred days wages and starts to choke him for the debt, throwing him in prison.
Of course he gets found out and the wicked servant himself gets thrown into jail – literally to the tormentors. Unforgiveness is torment.
The grace of God is immense. When Jesus died on the cross for your sin – it was for every thing – every thought, every action, every word that falls short of the glory of God – all paid off in full, forgiven. When we grasp that, forgiving others become a whole lot more easy.
As C.S. Lewis put it To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.
Decide
Forgiving is a choice – you will never do it if you wait until it feels right. We have to choose to obey God and not allow the devil free reign in our thoughts.
Forgiving means
Giving up resentment about the wrong done to you
Giving up resentment towards the wrongdoer
Giving up plans for retaliation.
So many times as I’m with people wrestling with us, I tell them to speak out “Lord I forgive so and so for x.” And then they say “Lord help me to forgive so and so for x”. Those are different things! What it means is that they haven’t chosen to forgive. First comes the choice and then the dependency on the Spirit to keep them forgiven.
Depend
You cannot forgive without the power of the Holy Spirit. It’s too hard to do on your own. If you are truly willing, God will enable you, but you must humble yourself and cry out to Him for help. In John 20:22-23 Jesus breathed on the disciples and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit!” His next instruction was about forgiving people. Ask God to breathe the Holy Spirit on you so you can forgive those who’ve hurt you.
Obey
There are a couple of things the Bible tells us to do in forgivings
1) Pray for them. Pray for your enemies and those who abuse and misuse you. Pray for their happiness and welfare (see Luke 6:27-28)
I was bullied at uni mercilessly, and wanted revenge. But when I forgave him and started praying for God to bless him. My anxiety over it went and he actually stopped because it was no longer affecting me.
2) Bless and do not curse them (Romans 12:14). In the Greek to bless means “to speak well of” and to curse means “to speak evil of.” You can’t walk in forgiveness and be a gossip. You must stop repeating the offense. You can’t get over it if you continue to talk about it. Proverbs 17:9 says that he who covers an offense seeks love.
Who?
Forgive the one who hurt you badly years ago and the guy that stepped on your toe in Tesco yesterday and everyone in between! Forgive quickly – the quicker you forgive the easier it is.
Application
Be forgiven
Four types of people here today
Spectator- watching, keep watching. Sometimes people realise they aren’t just watching they are actively seeking.
Seeker – serious asker of questions. Great keep asking. Sometimes people realise their questions have been answered and they are following Jesus.
Follower – I’m ready to follow Jesus. Sometimes people realise they want to making a difference with Jesus and become a builder
Builders – I want to build the kingdom
Jesus died on the cross for us so that we could be forgiven. Receive that this morning if you never had before.
Choose to forgive – do it now!
If you know that you are holding onto unforgiveness, then choose to forgive today.
If you know that bitterness has taken hold – then we will happily pray for you to be set free, but you need to choose to forgive those who have hurt you for it to go.
Listen…
Mercy in short supply?
| Speaker: | David Taylor |
| Series: | Hall of Mirrors |
| Date: | 12th Jul, 2026 |
| Download: | Mercy in short supply? |
| Plays: | 0 |
| Views: | 7 |
| Sermon notes: | Mercy in short supply?MERCY: IN SHORT SUPPLY? Jools Holland / Louise Marshall – Seven Acts of Mercy 1607 Painting by Caravaggio – depicts the seven acts of mercy. An angel at the centre top with an outstretched open hand depicts the transmitting of Grace. This emphasises that mercy is inspired by divine presence and flows through human action. We struggle on our own; we need God to enable us to show mercy and be forgiving. MATTHEW 18 v 21 – 35 The Parable of the Unforgiving Servant. This passage underlines what makes believers very different in the way in which we speak about or expose the sins, flaws and faults of others. Eph_2:10 for we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. 10000 talents 1 talent = 20 years wages for a labourer. (Lifetime debt) 100 denarii 1 denarii = a day’s wage. 3.5 months wage. Peter’s 7 becomes 77, in Judaism 3 times was sufficient to show a forgiving spirit, but not 4! So Peter with 7 thought he was doing well! True disciples of Jesus are to forgive without keeping count – 77. This may echo and reverse Lamech’s boast of vengeance in GEN 4 v 24 “If Cain’s revenge is 7 fold (God) then Lamech’s is 77 fold (Lamech’s vengeful passion). May I suggest that a person with a critical spirit loves to count, but a person filled with God’s Spirit enables a person to make forgiving a way of life? (30) Forgiveness is the highest form of showing mercy! Mercy, which is by nature undeserved, comes to those who receive it as a gift. It is also potentially transformative in nature. We have received undeserved mercy. The assumption that we will, in the light of that show mercy to the undeserving, is a reasonable one. God expects us to be reformed and reshaped by his wonderful gift. In this story, mercy has no impact; it doesn’t reach the inner man! V35 “from your heart” Mercy describes a divine attribute of God’s nature—He is “rich in mercy” (Ephesians 2:4), and His “mercy is great” (2 Samuel 24:14). Mercy has so many different descriptions, that several Hebrew and Greek words are used to express the dimensions of its meaning, words like compassion, lovingkindness, favour, and steadfast love often appear in Bible translations to illustrate the idea of mercy. A brief biblical definition of mercy is “the gift of God’s undeserved kindness and compassion.” On a human level, mercy is the benevolent or compassionate treatment of someone suffering or in need. Mercy is an attitude that moves us to act on behalf of those in need. On a divine level, mercy is the foundation of forgiveness expressed in God’s pardon of human sin. By His divine quality of mercy, God remains faithful to His covenant promises and His relationship with His people despite their unworthiness and faithlessness (Deuteronomy 30:1–6; Romans 9:15–16, 23; Ephesians 2:4–9)READ. Mercy and grace are evident in the salvation that is available through Jesus Christ. We deserved judgment, but in Christ we receive mercy from God and are delivered from judgment. In Christ we receive eternal salvation, forgiveness of sins, and abundant life (John 10:10)—all gifts of grace. Our response to the mercy and grace of God should be acceptance and to humbly come and worship with thanksgiving. Hebrews 4:16 declares, “Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Our hearts are changed. Forgive from the heart v 35. We linger at the cross and we live in the light of the cross. We will do to others what has been done to us on the cross.
James 2 v 13 “mercy triumphs over judgement”
In 1940, when Winston Churchill became prime minister, he forgave his bitter opponents for the sake of the greater victory in WW2. “Of this I am quite sure, that if we open a quarrel between the past and the present, we shall find that we have lost the future”
The Cross of Jesus was a horrible miscarriage of justice. Never let it become an unappreciated norm in our lives. We do not earn our forgiveness; Jesus achieved that for us on the cross. But your willingness to forgive is evidence that you have understood and received God’s forgiveness. Forgiven people forgive. Show mercy! Here I am humbled by Your Majesty Now I've found the greatest love of all is mine Majesty, Majesty Here I am humbled by the love that You give |
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Decide, depend and obey section based on Joyce Meyer Poison of Unforgiveness article
