Sermons
Apparently the UK is the 3rd loneliest country in Europe with 5 million people who have no close friend. In an age when teens can have thousands of friends on Facebook, or followers on Snapchat and the like, loneliness is an epidemic, exacerbated by the lockdowns of the last year or so.
I think of the friendship like these concentric circles. On the outside there are the many people I am friendly with, then acquaintances, then good friends, really good friends and very close friends! Personality has a part to play. Extroverts have more in the outer circles and introverts are more interested only in the inner circles.
Think of Jesus, he had the crowds who followed him, the 72, the 12, the 3 and the 1.
The most important friends are those in the very inner circles. Do you have any of those? Because Your friends are your future you
Our text today is Prov 13:20 – Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm. And that verse basically means your friends are your future you. If you have wise friends they will rub off on you. If you have fools for friends(by which Solomon means rebellious people) they also will rub off you to your harm.
If you were drunk last night – your friends were too. If you are chasing God, then your friends are too.
Those centre circle people are people you want to be like or who are wanting to be like you!
You are one friend away from becoming a better parent, a better spouse, a better runner or musician or whatever and a better disciple. Or you are one friend away from becoming worse.
Your friends are your future you!
Prov 12:26 The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.
Let's see how your friends are our future you by looking at three of King David's friends.
King David is the most important king of Israel in the Old Testament. He was a man after God's own heart.
Samuel – crown bestower
Samuel was the man that God used to pick David as King and anoint him. He was sent to Jesse's house to go find the king from among the sons. Each one was brought out and wasn't the one. Finally they brought in David who had been out in the fields looking after the sheep. He is the one.
Samuel prophecies over him, believes in hi, declares God truth over him.
Even though he was a young shepherd boy, his destiny is to be the King.
Samuel was the crown bestower! We need friends who believe in us, declare the truth to us and help us find our identity and purpose.
Not with dull Gym wall platitude – you can be whatever you want to be type stuff. But digging for the gold that God has put in and releasing it.
Your identity is in a large part determined by what the most important people in your life think of you.
Or as the the bottom line of this sermon goes – YOUR FRIENDS ARE YOUR FUTURE YOU!
Jonathan – faithful companion.
Samuel had come to David to declare him to be the king, because the first king Saul has made some consistently really dumb choices and been rejected by God. Jonathan happens to be Saul's son. So this could be awkward! But they are best friends, even though the friendship for Jonathan is going to be costly family wise. When David got to be king, it was even more costly.
Jonathan's attitude is God chose you and if I can help you I will!
One example is in 1 Sam 23:16 And Saul's son Jonathan went to David at Horesh and helped him find strength in God. “Don't be afraid,” he said. “My father Saul will not lay a hand on you. You will be king over Israel, and I will be second to you. Even my father Saul knows this.” The two of them made a covenant before the Lord. Then Jonathan went home, but David remained at Horesh.
Jonathan heard that David was discouraged and got up and walked 30 miles to go an encourage him. 30 miles! He helped him find strength – literally meaning of encourage, he reminded him of his destiny and allayed fears of Saul killing him.
Jonathan was an OT Barnabus!
He was not a passive friend, who doesn't return calls or text messages. He's not just a “I will pray for you” friend, but a “I will pray with you” friend
The third friend is Nathan – the loyal wounder!
Later on when David is secure as King in Jerusalem, he messes up big time. He's not where he should be, he is being a peeping tom on his roof, spots a lady bathing and commits adultery with her, then has her husband killed to cover it up.
Nathan is prompted by the Lord to confront him. Which he does by telling an emotive story that gets David riled – that man should die. But David you are that man! Oops.
Nathan is a friend that is not afraid to confront David and tell him what a fool he has been. We need friends that tell us when we are about to make a stupid decision, or go down a bad path.
One of my favourite films is “Notting Hill” perhaps just because it contains the line “Whoopsiedaisy” Hugh Grant's character has somehow fallen in love and then been rejected by Julia Roberts' character. She tries to say sorry with an original Hopper painting that he likes and he's too in pain to risk it. He's sitting with his closest friends who are all agreeing with him that he has made the right decision when he clearly hasn't. Then the funny Welsh character comes in, hears the story and calls him a “daft plonker” confronting the stupid decision he has made. He's the only one with the guts to confront him. Then all the rest jump on in agreement.
Your friends are your future you!
When we have a Nathan – loyal wounder confront us, how do we respond? It might make you mad, but it could save your life.
Prov 27:6 Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses
The quality of these horizontal friendships – Samuel the crown bestower, Jonathan the faithful companion and Nathan the loyal wounder. They are dependent on the quality of the vertical relationships with the Lord.
Jesus is our best and ultimate friend
Those three of David's friends are all what we call types of Christ. They are normal people who in one aspect looking a little bit Jesus. They point forward to Jesus.
Samuel spoke into being David's destiny. He was a shepherd boy declared to be king before he became on. Jesus comes to us sinners and declares us saints, holy ones. We were spiritually dead in our sin and Jesus declares and makes us alive in Him. We were not part of God's people, His family on earth and now we are.
Jonathan at great cost became David's friend. One that one occasion he walked 30 miles to come to David. Jesus crossed the gap between deity and humanity. Jesus gave up his right of place in heaven to come to us and take us back. Jesus gave up his life for us.
Nathan confronted rather than condemned David's sin so that he could be forgiven and restored and know God's presence even while facing the consequences of his sin.
Jesus comes to us and show us our sin, our need of Him so that we too can become a forgiven people, friends of God.
Your friends are your future you!
Do you have Jesus as friend. Have you turned to Him and believed in Him – her the one Proverbs promises to be “closer than a brother”
Do you have friends like
Samuel – crown bestower – who will help you find your destiny in God?
Jonathan – faith companion and encourager
Nathan – loyal wounder, who will speak the truth to you.
Takes time, effort and pain to make and be those kinds of friends. But they are better for you than thousands of Facebook follower friends!